Posts from Fun

I hope no one thought that I don't like the developers of Heroes 5; it was just a joke...

I hope no one thought that I don't like the developers of Heroes 5, it was just a joke…

Funny, but hurtful! : (

Funny, but also frustrating! : (

It's just a joke... I really believe and hope that the patch will be released on time... as well as the expansion...

I hope I don't get arrested for counterfeiting...



I just really wanted this patch...

About drug addicts: A drug addict is sitting, rolling a joint, and sees: an old man is walking, and there's an open manhole on the road. The drug addict: - Grandpa... uh... watch out... One drug addict calls another: - Where are you? - At a birthday party. - Oh... and where is this, the bottom of a birthday party?

Seven little goats are fighting a wolf: - What are you doing, wolves! - Shut up, goat! - Hello, class. My name is Doctor Lector. It's not a profession, it's a surname. Winnie and Piglet are in the bathhouse: - Piglet, should I add some hot water? - Go to hell!...Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! Winnie and Piglet are playing war: - Winnie, Winnie, I'm out of bullets! BANG!!!! - Catch!

- Have you watched the Benny Hill show?
- No, what's it about?

Another one featuring Ilya Muromets:
Ilya Muromets and Chalubey faced each other in a duel. Chalubey swung and struck Ilya Muromets, and Ilya Muromets sank knee-deep into the ground. The Russian land accepted Ilya Muromets! Ilya Muromets swung and struck Chalubey, and Chalubey sank knee-deep into the... well, you know... The Russian land did not accept Chalubey...

Again, about the same topic...
I want a patch, that's all there is to it!!!

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English lesson:

- Vovochka, say "door".
- Dwe-er...
- What is that!?!

The girls decided to shame Vovochka. During the lesson, if he says something inappropriate, they will all stand up and leave the classroom. During the lesson.
Teacher:
- Children, what can be built from bricks?
Children:
- A hospital!
- A stadium!
Vovochka:
- A panel building!
The girls stood up and headed for the exit.
Vovochka:
- Where are you going, you sluts! They haven't even laid the foundation yet!

Petka walks in to see Vasily Ivanovich sitting on a stool, fidgeting with a brown ball in his hand.
Vasily Ivanovich:
- Tell me, Petka: is this shit or plasticine?
Petka (sniffing):
- Shit
Vasily Ivanovich:
- That's what I'm thinking: where did the plasticine come from in my ass?

Added 11 hours 39 minutes ago
A traffic cop stops a man:
- Blow into the tube.
- I can't, I have asthma...
- Well, then a blood test.
- I can't, I have a blood clotting disorder...
- Well... walk the line.
- I can't, I'm drunk...

In Georgia, a traffic cop stops a driver:
- Do you have a first-aid kit?
- Yes.
- Do you have a fire extinguisher?
- Yes.
- Do you have a driver's license?
- Yes.
- Do you have a radio?
- Yes.
- Then turn it on.
The driver turns it on. The sounds of a Lezginka begin to play, and the traffic cop starts dancing around the car and shouts:
- What are you looking at? Don't you see me dancing? Give me money!!

A traffic cop stops a very drunk driver:
- Can you explain your condition to me?
- Comrade policeman, we were going to have a barbecue with friends, we took two cases of vodka, drank it. It wasn't enough - we bought three more. Now I'm going for beer.
- Blow into the tube!
- Don't you believe me?!

And a little poem taken from the Comedy Club show (based on the melody of the song "all can be kings")

All can be patrols, all can be patrols:
Check your passport and not let you drive,
But no matter what you say, they can't take your rubles
No patrol can.
No patrol can:D

ABOUT LICENSES.
I bought a LICENSED (unbreakable) Warhammer, on 3 discs...
The disc marked with the number 3 is the second one... what a bummer, and it's the licensed version.

http://pers.ru/cgi-bin/play.cgi?game=20001481

Poke the penguin.:) But don't get too carried away...;)

Uneducated Borya dropped out of school,
And now with a smile,
He writes on the fence with chalk
Who "Hu" is... with mistakes.:D :D :D

I will wear a white dress,
A blue-striped sweater.
Whoever sits at the computer -
I'll scratch their face!:) :) :) :) :)

My dear is sitting on the porch
With an expression on his face.
That expression shows
What he's sitting on the porch for.
:D

There's a glass on the table,
And a cockroach in the glass.
Grandma thought it was a raspberry,
And bit half of it.

My sweetheart is a tractor driver,
And I'm a milkmaid.
He's covered in tar, I'm covered in manure,
What a sweet couple we are!

Uncle Vanya plays the harmonica
He played the harmonica!
He played in the forbidden zone...
They shot him right there!
;)
He glares menacingly from the screen
A bearded monkey -
He likes to choose Iran
As president of the monkeys. :D :D

We won't drink vodka,
We'll save our money,
And when we save five rubles,
We'll drink vodka again.
Well, this is definitely the last time for us!:)

A rabbit is sitting on the edge of a cliff and crying:
- cow...
A horse approaches him and asks:
- Hey rabbit, why are you crying?
- cow...
- what "cow"?
- cow...
- What do you mean "cow"??
- cow...
- You're getting on my nerves!
- cow...
- Just watch...
The horse runs up and jumps on the rabbit, the rabbit bends down, and the horse falls into the cliff.
- Little horse...

Added 6 hours 58 minutes ago
Excerpts from a Japanese-Russian dictionary (absolutely serious! It's written exactly like this!):

Baka - fool, idiot
Gaijin - foreigner
Baka-gaijin - American

Another interesting fact:

Mexicans call Americans "gringo," but the paradox is that "Gringo" translates to "bastard" in Russian.

I had an experience: I was playing Lineage II, a dark elf runs up to me and writes: "hi man!)". I said to him: "American?", he replied: "yap))". I decided to joke around and wrote: "Bush - stupid", he replied: "i know))".
Then we became friends, and we played together in a party for a long time until it was time for him to go to sleep. That's how it was:D

Everything written here is pure truth. Any insult to any political figures in this post is absolutely intentional and not a coincidence. :)