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He shouldn't have approached him because the detective knew judo and Thai boxing, could shoot from two pistols at a coin from 100 meters, and has been working in the police for 35 years, so he has nothing to fear. His salary is small, he doesn't have a mobile phone, only a radio. As for Gena, he's a terrible guy. He played Stalker non-stop for 2 years, after which he mutated and turned into a barking pseudo-crocodile and crossbred with Cheburashka. Only one person, or rather two, could save them. These are SpongeBob and his opposite, Sponge Gop.

Just when things seemed to be calming down, the metalheads and rockers returned. As soon as they spotted the thugs, they went into a bloodthirsty frenzy (because their metalhead brother had been taken down), and Chicotillo and Arantir were torn to shreds...
After that, peace finally descended upon that world, which might seem like a tautology...

Basically, Chapter 2!...

During the events described in the first chapter, the alien invaders were not idle. While MegaBot was doing the dirty work for its creators, they managed to build a laboratory. And they called it either "Hive" or "Ant Hill." There, they conducted inhumane experiments on ordinary citizens. The subjects were forced to eat McDonald's food every day, but that was not the worst part. They were all given one outhouse, and, as you can imagine, after a couple of visits, the stench was terrible. While sleeping, the people were zombified by domestic pop music, and during the day, by watching various reality shows. This is how the alien invaders trained their best warriors. But that's not all... The aliens captured Sergey Zverev and cloned him... and not just once. And now, an entire army of obedient zombies is preparing to take to the streets and enslave this mortal world. And countless Zverevs are preparing the world for this. And the world is ready to plunge into glamour again, but...

It would have been perfect for the aliens if rockers and metalheads hadn't recruited Zurab Tsiriteli. Tsiriteli created the MegaScene, where they placed MegaSpeakers, and gave metalheads and rockers MegaGuitars. They decided to hold a MegaRockMetalConcert to celebrate the newly established peace. The aliens strongly opposed this, because music on such a scale would awaken the zombie mosquitoes, and for those whose brains have already been eaten, it would create new ones, while the sound would give the aliens the Third Cosmic effect (I know, there isn't one))) and send them beyond the galaxy, unless they crash into a star along the way...

...a star named Alpha Centauri. There they are, flying from the 3rd KS and approaching this very ill-fated star. But while they were flying, the aliens wondered what a mess this was. How did they fall for this trap, and their minds sank into nirvana, where they began to think about the future. And in their heads, even such thoughts arose:
Registered as a candidate
The ananists of the whole country
Became a complete degenerate
You whine and have dreams
Dreams about what was before
Before, you were a sucker
And now you have become a piece of shit
With a shrunken brain.
And these thoughts oppressed them, and it all started with what, with some harmless fecal matter scattered across the vast, dense forest...
Such a turn of events did not suit the leader of the aliens at all; he was disturbed by one thing: how could we, highly developed aliens, fail to win such a terribly bloody war? What awaits us on this star, to which they were approaching, hour by hour, minute by minute, not to mention that...

Feces from the forest are flying after them....
xDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

“Prepare for battle!” shouted the main alien. And immediately, the first wave of… well, let’s just say “organic matter,” knocked down about a third of the alien warriors. Some of them couldn’t get up afterward. Panic spread among the aliens – and understandably so. You’re peacefully flying through space, and suddenly you’re being bombarded with… fecal matter! Many, in a panic, jumped from the spaceship into the open cosmos, and some even resorted to suicide. A few tried to defend themselves, holding up shields in the form of toilets. But the shields shattered into pieces upon impact with the… you know.

They really messed up with the aliens. After finally arriving on an unknown planet in an unknown galaxy, they smelled so bad that the abundant life on the planet immediately disappeared. Oxygen vanished, and methane filled the atmosphere. On top of that, the sound wave from the Mega Rock Metal Concert arrived, killing half of the alien visitors and causing concussion in the others. Only Zverev-original, due to his complete lack of taste and smell, and the fact that the space in his skull intended for a brain was filled with glamour, was practically unharmed by the fall. But after falling, he broke 2 fingernails and had a hysterical fit. Recovering, he took the restoration of the aliens into his own hands, which inevitably signaled the creation of a pop alien race...

In a fit of hysteria, Zverev noticed that while he was freaking out, he had broken all his nails. He had a heart attack from the HORROR! The aliens were embarrassed about what they could do while their leader was out of it, and then they called for help... Elena Yerkova...

Added after 49 seconds
P.S. We need to revive the topic; why has everyone gone silent?

Comrades!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The thread is dying, no one has posted for a month! Let's revive the thread like we revive virgin land!!!!!!!!!!!

In my opinion, this topic has reached a dead end – it’s no longer interesting to make fun of popular things. But! You need to find a way out of any dead end!))) So, I’m going to take a quick break and come up with a new idea...

Added after 3 hours and 56 minutes
So, I took a break... I read 3 pages of news, visited the torture chamber, and downloaded a couple of videos...
The plot is as follows: a killer dog starts eating everyone in the city.

Well, firstly, not everyone, but those involved in the illegal trade and manipulation of Chappies (dogs-killers, they really don't like them, and Cerberuses especially), it should be noted that this dog was indeed a Cerberus. And therefore, it had its own people (in the sense, dogs) who tried to eliminate Kit-Kat from the world market. But the local criminal boss, Khkot-f-zsapogkhakh, couldn't tolerate this...

P.S. You can make fun of something other than pop culture, like fairy tales, politicians, cartoons, historical figures, or anything else. Just don't violate the portal's and the Russian Federation's rules.

Dude, Dragon, you didn't understand me))) It's a freaking killer dog!))) Its owner is Comrade Goblin himself! It was trained in the Blood Den! Among its distant relatives is the Hound of the Baskervilles! And in general, it has a kennel in the 4th power unit of the Chernobyl Nuclear Power Plant))) So, there's panic in the city, the main highway is jammed with cars, and that very dog is walking along that highway, opening cans of human meat (cars) along the way. Panic, everyone is screaming, especially stupid teenagers climbed into an arms store and started shooting at anyone they could - of course, they were soon taken care of... Who will save the peaceful residents of America from the evil descendant of the USSR regime?)) Place your bets! I'm betting 100 rubles on the killer dog!)))

I'm betting 80 rubles on Khkot-in-boots. (I had to spend the rest on Chappy, the hellish dog, or it would have tried to make a meal out of me.) And in general, if a dog is hellish, why can't it love Chappy? I think all dogs, even hellish ones, love Chappy.
P.S. If I were a teenager, I'd sneak into a strip club. That's where the real fun is))))))))

What the heck?!)) Stupid teenagers are 100 times better at handling weapons than an army!!!)))
The dog is a genetic engineering monster from the USSR, and it only eats "Tourist Breakfast," but since the infamous USSR collapsed and "Tourist Breakfast" is no longer available, it starts eating canned McDonald's (i.e., Americans)))) And since the dog is from Chernobyl, it also loves nuclear power plants))) Well, of course, and barrels of nuclear waste.
Okay, but there's also a mega battle between an American kitty and a Soviet dog...