Posts from ☀️ Arselia and Akonia Auto-translated

Oh, come on, she's not that bad. Just wash her up, give her some chamomile tea, and she'll be beautiful.

— From this, we can conclude that the key element of your current state is beauty, or rather, the lack thereof.

- Let's assume that's true, but what can be done about it? How can we get rid of this and restore everything to its original state? - Merel wondered, realizing whose fault it was.

Barsina End of the road No events.

☀️

🗡️❌

☀️

🌪️

☀️

Temple of Shiris Beginning of the road. No events.

06/30/975, morning. -16 units of provisions.
06/30/975, evening. The travelers encounter a desert storm and lose one day. -8 units of provisions.
A new month begins.
07/02/975, morning. -16 units of provisions.
07/02/975, evening. Ann avoids a confrontation with bandits. -8 units of provisions.
07/03/975, morning. -16 units of provisions.
07/04/975, evening. The travelers return to Barsina.

Survived 1 month in the Revan expansion 🚬😎

Oh, come on, she's not that unappealing. Just wash her, give her some chamomile tea, and she'll be beautiful.

give her a haircut, remove the tattoos, and give her some calming medication...

“Yeah, we lost so many things in the sands… but at least now we have enough to get some better boots,” the Tanarrian girl said ironically as the three of them returned to the city. “I guess we should go rest and get ourselves cleaned up, and tomorrow we can check the job board for something better, right? Because, to be honest, the idea of another long journey through the sands is starting to make me a little nervous. Especially without a talented guide like An by our side.”

- Let's assume that's true, but what do we do about it? How do we fix this and get everything back to normal? - Merel wondered, trying to understand whose fault it was.

— Well, here's what we'll do.
There was a lot of various inventory in the basement. Opening one of the tightly locked cabinets, Tentacle takes out a vessel with something strange inside and shows it to Merel.

— This is a "chill." It is administered intranasally, after which it climbs up on its own and attaches to the inside of the frontal lobe. Coexisting with a person, it protects its carrier well from external mental influence and will help overcome your ailment. Since you have, let's say, an occupational injury... Or an occupational curse, to be more precise? I won't charge you for it, even though they are very expensive.

Wow, we gave him a portrait for experiments, and we still owe him something, but he's giving Merel a free worm. Where's the justice?!

Having considered everything, Keliandra realized that she would need at least thirty insults for thirty prominent figures in the capital to succeed. And it would be even better to have some extra, just in case the client doesn't like something. What a pathetic use of literary talent... But as they say, money is always needed!

Let's go!

1. Captain Strauss? A pretentious poser! And he's pretentious in every sense of the word. All he does is stand at the gate, all dressed up and looking rich.
2. Sarana Valz? A sharp-tongued bitch! She's always getting into trouble with her little sword, waving it around without thinking, and she doesn't care about anyone. And don't ask me where I got this information.
3. Viktor Loss? A dull-witted idiot! You have to be an idiot to attack everyone. Instead of brains, he clearly has a huge two-handed sword. I wonder, does he use it to compensate for the size of something else?
4. Nora White? A groupie for a charismatic jerk! She's just obsessed with Raphael, she can't live without him, but he has nothing but charisma.
5. Caravella Lin? A ring-obsessed fool! All she does is hand out rings to random mages, giving them to everyone and ruining their lives. She's not capable of anything more.
6. Lucina Light? A seeker of nothing! She heads the guild of adventurers, but she doesn't do anything herself! She just hangs out in her mansion and gives out orders. What a great adventurer, keep it up!
7. Faemira Ufebi? Miss Home for Idiots! She doesn't even bother to check who she lets stay overnight. The idiots who stay with her are so awful, it's terrifying! Truly, your Faemira's place is a home for idiots.
8. Lotr Lost? A genius of pointless criticism! He remembers some old jokes from his youth and compares them to commissioned works, and then tears them apart with his criticism, but he gets paid like they're masterpieces! He's clearly insane!
9. Bazhena? A dancer for perverts! She seems to be proud of her skills with a spear, but she doesn't specify what kind. She swears just as much as you do, looks like a slut, and talks like a slut. It's obvious how she raises the prestige of the club where she works.
10. Arabella Kizham? A sorceress who teaches how to walk! You can be an excellent mage three times over, but she'll still subtly put you down if you even hint that you might be able to help her with something! Her self-esteem comes straight from Anush!
11. Edin? A passive faggot! He looks like someone who likes to lie down under a strong man, he's afraid of women, and his voice is so gentle. It's surprising that he even dares to participate in debates in the philosophical guild. Apparently, he gets there through the bedroom.
12. Richard Goodville? Curious Goodville! ...broke his nose at the market... he pretends to be a psychiatrist and interferes in other people's business. He tries to pry out your secrets! He's cunning, slippery, and extremely curious!
13. Zheldvag Evtych? An unemployed ass! He's in charge of delegating work to others. He doesn't do anything himself. It's strange that he's not the husband of our "Seeker of Nothing"! They're a perfect match.
14. Grigory Zaum? A brainless idiot! He spent half his life trying to build a romantic relationship with that very Bazhena! Does that sound like nonsense? Well, that's him! He's an absolute idiot.
15. Guy from "Dryads"? A victim of sexual frustration! He hates women so much that he doesn't let them past the threshold of his store. And yet, he has figurines of beautiful women. What a nightmare! It seems he's seriously been denied!
16. Alice? A Lunarian bitch! Every time I see her, she insults other Lunarians. Both women and men. And yet, she wears flashy clothes and sells sexy outfits. It seems she doesn't like her own people.
17. Gaheris Bors? A phantom abuser! He hides behind his shop, you can't find him, he only makes contact in rare cases, and he puts all the responsibilities for managing the store on a woman. Do you know the word "abuse"? That's what it is with him. I'm afraid to imagine what he does to that poor girl. She doesn't even dare to speak!
18. Shopkeeper from "Phantom"? A mute doll! I don't know what's wrong with her, but with such a boss, it's not surprising that she's so strange. She doesn't say anything, she doesn't even look like a living person... I feel sorry for her, but there's no pleasure in "communicating" with her.
19. Ayko? A short little bitch! The leader of Carneola. Small, annoying, she sticks her nose in everywhere. She's not attractive in the slightest... and what can you even say good about a gnome?!
20. Raphael? A latent charisma-obsessed jerk! He tries to pretend that he can do something without his charisma, but it's terrible. It's annoying! And he's also lecherous and depraved! It's hard to find a woman in the capital that he hasn't tried to seduce... However, Raphael is a total failure in these matters.
21. Kilika? A gnome slave! She does all the dirty work for Ayko in Carneola. It seems she likes it. And then the gnome slaps her on the ass, and she likes it even more! How can you even comment on that?!
22. Gion? An eternal virgin! He's in love with Beata, but she doesn't give him the time of day! Do I need to say anything else?
23. Garret? A time-waster! The most useless member of Carneola. He's so pompous, he walks around like he's the most important person. He's the best assassin in the area. But he's as useful as a stone on the road. All he can do is waste time!
24. Merel? A closeted gay! He spends all his time running around libraries, he doesn't talk to anyone, he looks like a cute little boy. I'm sure that in the archives, he's not touching books, but strong male asses.
25. Astellia? A mercenary whore! What can a maid do in a mercenary squad? Only serve guys like Raphael in between mopping floors! He approaches her three or four times a day. I didn't see it, but I'm sure!
26. Kalina? A squid's sweet ass! And I haven't even met her boss yet... The whole atmosphere of "Tentacle" is permeated with an ancient Eastern culture called "hentai." I'm sure that Bronislava gets special pleasure from working under Eugene.
27. Anna Roa? Spoiled fish! Oh, my goddess, how senselessly this girl wastes her life! She sells fish, seafood, tentacles... Is she one of them too, like Bronislava? Her youth is spoiled... for the sake of fish...
28. Kayasa Morax? A witch-robber! In the capital, mages are like manure with rings. Only the most desperate would go and give money to this person for training. Of course, she doesn't care about the rights of her own colleagues. She just makes money on the exorbitant prices of the academy!
29. Draco Mellis? A mustached bastard! I've heard about this guy... The activities of his organization always go hand in hand with the policy of the council. And what's the point of that? The workers are nothing more than Mellis's personal slaves. He's a hypocrite and a bastard!
30. Keliandra? A cavewoman idiot! This girl from Carneola isn't much different from Beata. She grew up in a cave, and her social skills are exactly what you'd expect from someone with that background. She's impossible, self-absorbed, and an idiot. She's very stupid... and incredibly naive...

Keliandra finished the list of insults and gave it to her client.

I'm so tired... I've been writing this for two hours! I deserve these three hundred gold for the incredible psychological damage and stress...

19. Ayko? What a shorty!

I would call her Ayko-the-peeler...

—Yeah, we lost so many things in the sands... but at least now we have enough to get some better boots, — the Tanarrian girl said ironically as the three of them returned to the city. —I guess we should go rest and get ourselves cleaned up, and tomorrow we can check the quest board for some better jobs? Because, to be honest, the idea of another long journey through the sands makes me a little uneasy. Especially without a talented guide like An by our side.

—Exactly. —the knight nodded, struggling to stay on his feet (but this time for a different reason). —We can’t just rely on boots and pockets full of junk. And those things that scare away enemies aren’t cheap, unfortunately.

In the hidden location, Klin also asks the raven if one person could theoretically contain multiple stone hearts at once.

Gillon? A perpetual virgin! He's in love with Beata, but she won't give him the time of day! Do we need any more commentary?

Well, actually... Hmm, but then again, how would Kelianne know? She wasn't there, and Biba and Bob probably wouldn't tell her about their sex life.

The main thing here is to insult, whether it's true or not doesn't matter at all.

Wow, we gave him a portrait for experiments, and we still owe him something, but he's giving Merel a free worm. Where's the justice?!

Send a message to Sportloto in the name of Draco Mellis.

Merel? A closeted gay! He's always hanging around the libraries, doesn't really talk to anyone, and looks like a sweet little boy, just... *sigh*. I'm sure he's not touching books in the archive, but rather strong male behinds.

Thanks, Astral, you brought me back to 2007, when we used to make jokes about Arandor's orientation.

The main thing here is to insult, whether it's true or not doesn't matter at all.

True insults are more hurtful.