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What would happen if someone threw a shoe at the head of state?
Bush: Dodges, then says, "The shoe was a size ten!", the security guards take the person who threw the shoe away and break his arm.
Putin: Catches the shoe in mid-air, throws it back, and hits the aggressor between the eyes. Then the security guards take him away, and nothing more is known about him.
Medvedev: Ducks, so the shoe flies over him, and says, "Well, everyone has the right to express their opinion..." The hooligan is taken away by security, and the next day he is fired from his job.
Obama: The security guards catch the hooligan who didn't have time to take off his shoe and carry him out of the room. Everyone is sure that the person just felt unwell.
Hu Jintao (Chairman of the People's Republic of China): When the shoe-thrower enters the building, the security's resident telepath notices suspicious mental activity, and security detains everyone within a 10-meter radius until the circumstances are clarified.
Yushchenko: Gets hit in the face with the shoe, after which he accuses the person who threw the shoe of being a "Kremlin agent" and wanting to "undermine Ukraine's independence." Supporters of Tymoshenko rush in and begin chanting anti-Yushchenko slogans.
Saakashvili: Seeing the shoe flying towards him, he hides under the table and from there informs everyone present about the termination of the speech "due to an unexpected change in the situation." Security forces push everyone out of the room.
Lukashenko: Dodges the shoe. Security takes the opposition member by the arms and leads him to the president. Lukashenko asks, "What are you unhappy about?", listens to the answer, and begins to talk about how much he has done to improve the lives of the people and the prosperity of Belarus. The ashamed opposition member is taken away by security.
Nazarbayev: Dodges the shoe, runs up to the rioter and personally beats him, with the help of security.
Pratibha Patil (woman, President of India): Gently catches the thrown shoe in mid-air, presses it to her chest, and begins to sing and dance. Security guards lead a round dance around the person who threw the shoe, who also sings and dances.
Recording of the President's New Year's greeting.
The President is given a text to read. He glances at it, says in surprise:
"This has already happened! Couldn't our PR people come up with something new, something positive... After all, there is a crisis, and everyone wants to hear something stable, encouraging, cheerful."
"Dmitry Anatolyevich, I assure you, this is positive and encouraging."
"Vladimir Vladimirovich, maybe I should say it in my own words...?"
"No, just look at the camera and read."
"Dear Russians! I'm tired, I'm leaving..."
A rally of patriots. On the podium, another orator:
"My fellow countrymen! Russian people!!! I will tell you about a tragedy that happened just the other day. My friend Vasya Pupkin, a man who is deeply - I emphasize: deeply! - law-abiding, after drinking a bottle of vodka, went out on the balcony, climbed over the railing, and fell. And now, obeying the law of some Briton with the Jewish name Isaac, he fell down and was killed!!! How long will the West continue to impose its laws on Russia?!! How long, I ask you?!!"
"Oh, girls, yesterday I smeared a colander with Blend-a-med toothpaste. In the morning - not a single hole."
Urologist? The most disgusting type! He looked at my penis with disdain, touched it with two fingers - and then presented such a bill, as if he had performed oral sex..."
Somali pirates demanded payment for the constant exercises conducted with the naval forces of various countries.
What would happen if someone threw a shoe at the head of state?
Bush: Dodges, then says, "The shoe was a size ten!", the security guards take the person who threw the shoe away and break his arm.
Putin: Catches the shoe in mid-air, throws it back, and hits the aggressor between the eyes. Then the security guards take him away, and nothing more is known about him.
Medvedev: Ducks, so the shoe flies over him, and says, "Well, everyone has the right to express their opinion..." The hooligan is taken away by security, and the next day he is fired from his job.
Obama: The security guards catch the hooligan who didn't have time to take off his shoe and carry him out of the room. Everyone is sure that the person just felt unwell.
Hu Jintao (Chairman of the People's Republic of China): When the shoe-thrower enters the building, the security's resident telepath notices suspicious mental activity, and security detains everyone within a 10-meter radius until the circumstances are clarified.
Yushchenko: Gets hit in the face with the shoe, after which he accuses the person who threw the shoe of being a "Kremlin agent" and wanting to "undermine Ukraine's independence." Supporters of Tymoshenko rush in and begin chanting anti-Yushchenko slogans.
Saakashvili: Seeing the shoe flying towards him, he hides under the table and from there informs everyone present about the termination of the speech "due to an unexpected change in the situation." Security forces push everyone out of the room.
Lukashenko: Dodges the shoe. Security takes the opposition member by the arms and leads him to the president. Lukashenko asks, "What are you unhappy about?", listens to the answer, and begins to talk about how much he has done to improve the lives of the people and the prosperity of Belarus. The ashamed opposition member is taken away by security.
Nazarbayev: Dodges the shoe, runs up to the rioter and personally beats him, with the help of security.
Pratibha Patil (woman, President of India): Gently catches the thrown shoe in mid-air, presses it to her chest, and begins to sing and dance. Security guards lead a round dance around the person who threw the shoe, who also sings and dances.
Recording of the President's New Year's greeting.
The President is given a text to read. He glances at it, says in surprise:
"This has already happened! Couldn't our PR people come up with something new, something positive... After all, there is a crisis, and everyone wants to hear something stable, encouraging, cheerful."
"Dmitry Anatolyevich, I assure you, this is positive and encouraging."
"Vladimir Vladimirovich, maybe I should say it in my own words...?"
"No, just look at the camera and read."
"Dear Russians! I'm tired, I'm leaving..."
A rally of patriots. On the podium, another orator:
"My fellow countrymen! Russian people!!! I will tell you about a tragedy that happened just the other day. My friend Vasya Pupkin, a man who is deeply - I emphasize: deeply! - law-abiding, after drinking a bottle of vodka, went out on the balcony, climbed over the railing, and fell. And now, obeying the law of some Briton with the Jewish name Isaac, he fell down and was killed!!! How long will the West continue to impose its laws on Russia?!! How long, I ask you?!!"
"Oh, girls, yesterday I smeared a colander with Blend-a-med toothpaste. In the morning - not a single hole."
Urologist? The most disgusting type! He looked at my penis with disdain, touched it with two fingers - and then presented such a bill, as if he had performed oral sex..."
Somali pirates demanded payment for the constant exercises conducted with the naval forces of various countries.