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Posts from Humor in Heroes of Might and Magic V.

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#243
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Dianel
Recently, I decided to try my hand at the "dungeon" genre:

My parents named me Railag.
All my life, I lived as if I were a bug.
My father was in the clan of the Sternhearts
And became a complete demon worshipper.
Then Matrona followed him,
And there was no reason for me to be good.
It's clear that I didn't find my talents and knowledge in Irolan.
I was drawn to the demonic fate.
I studied Chaos, Urgash's will.
It's clear that, given all the racial characteristics,
I wasn't a talentless demon at all.
But intellect and will awakened,
And I fell in love with Isabel against my will.
And now, for my beloved queen,
I am uniting Igg-Shail with my power.
Believe me, I have been in different countries,
Of course, everywhere life is very colorful,
But here, among the caves and crystals,
Life has become much more pleasant for me.

Excellent rap from Railag, I liked it!)
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#244
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A Ballad of the Irollan Minstrel

In Irollan lived a minstrel, composing verses carefree...
From his wondrous rhymes, all creatures laughed endlessly.

He believed his poetry was a gift from Silanna...
But everyone around him insisted he was a talentless poet.

Our minstrel returned the emerald dragons...
And immediately drove them away with his own verses!

They say that the minstrel's poems
Fill everyone around with delight and rapture...
But the Sylvan is not like that,
Even his relatives blush
From his talentless verses!

The minstrel's path led to a knight and a mage...
Oh, Sar'Ilam, save us from these rhymes and melodies!

He said one useful thing – to end Isabella...
But would anyone listen to a Sylvan minstrel?

The minstrel walks in a quartet, singing about passion and tenderness...
Shut him up already, Railag, kick him in the groin!

And so the Sylvan diplomat returned to Irollan...
But there are no beautiful forests left, only ruins lie there!

Dark kin came to the Sylvans,
And from this raid, the elven forests were devastated.

The minstrel returned home, stopped the enemy,
And they elected him king... of ruins and graves.

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#245
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