Posts from 🍁Nine Ancient Obelisks Auto-translated

- C. H. E. R. R. Y... Up yours! That's who! Why does everyone read her newspapers? Is there so little talent among the Cher and Pernil in the guild? I think this reeks of nepotism! Or something else equally sinister. How else can this be explained? She's probably secretly visiting the Tsar at night or someone else! Fine, let's not talk about her. The last thing I need is to clutter my head with that psycho! We'd go crazy ourselves! - Struggling to catch her breath, the stranger continues. - So, questions... I have three of them. First - which city in Asuguh do you think is the coolest, and which is the worst? I want a list from best to worst with comments on why. THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS QUESTION! 

—The best one is, of course, Onkaih. It's a wonderful place for introverts and people focused on their peaceful existence, without being distracted by the temptations and hustle and bustle of big cities. And it's also the headquarters of the guild of scholars, which says a lot. It's very beautiful and picturesque, interesting people live there, and in general, your soul rests, as if you came on vacation. Probably... because I'm currently unemployed.

—In second place is Sizki. You might say that this doesn't fit with the previous conclusion, but the fact is that I'm from there! Big cities have their advantages: no one cares about you, all social services are at hand, there are more jobs and higher salaries, and it is also better protected than the others, as practice shows. In Onkaih, if something happens, you will be missed at best in a week or two. And also, there is a library in Sizki. The best in the world, by the way! For nerds like me, it's literally a relic.

—Then I would put Enlil in third place. I'm a person who is infinitely far from art, but it's better to have such refined peaceful cities with exhibitions and galleries than arenas with altars of sacrifice, isn't it? It's clean, tidy, elegant, the inhabitants are unique, but without negativity... for the most part.

—Let it be Ninamiat. I like how the city and port infrastructure are combined there, there are many interesting (and not always safe) shops, all sorts of tourist things, but not too much, and they also have such a... colorful protector.

—Mufigur. It's like Onkaih, only more dangerous and less welcoming. People hardened by steel live there; one random merchant seems to be able to run a country.

—Perhaps, next is Faris. For me, it's such an average city: there is not much for a peaceful, specialized person to do there, but in the current situation, one cannot deny the usefulness of such military-oriented places. And for people interested in sports, there is probably something to do... or there would be, before the local competition bureau burned down.

—Suggar should be moved down a bit. On the one hand, I don't like the excessive cultural closeness of this city to Kalcitu. As practice has shown, there's a reason for that! But on the other hand, you can really find unique and very useful goods there that can't be found anywhere else in Asuguh. So, a big plus for a big minus.

—Well, let's say Ruzaniel. In the current situation, it would probably be even lower, for obvious reasons... For a person deprived of lucky traits, I don't like the local atmosphere. And I probably wouldn't get along with the local contingent... But I can imagine a whole layer of people who have found a second home here! There is definitely no better place in our country to lose all your savings without a trace.

—Last is Shingen. Wizards and sorcerers may be very useful and cool, but I'm as far from them as... I don't know, come up with a suitable example yourself. We are from different planets and speak different languages, so I will never understand this city.

Erika is sleeping and catching up on rest.

- Okay, next question... Name the five coolest and five lamest people you've met in Asugai... It doesn't matter if they're locals or not. And yes, with comments. LET'S MAKE JOURNALISM INTERESTING AGAIN!

—Himal is a city guard. We used to get along, but after the last incident when he made me look like a crazy person, I have a bad attitude towards him. Let him sit in the office until retirement, filling out his documents, boo-hoo.

Erica goes to Jingo's workshop.

—Wow, I see you're one of those people who are so cool that even I think it's too much... —the scholar remarked. —In the future, gears will be replaced by machines, and they will do all the hard work for us. And by the way, you can get in shape from books just as well as from any dumbbell!

—Our king is cool. Not in terms of some laws and other things, it's all subjective. But simply because he thinks it's good for himself and for the nation, that's what he does. And the church, the invaders, and others can only be helplessly angry. I don't think anyone else could do that. His daughter is also cool, did you hear how she took down the air lord?

—Professor Peleng. He manages to do everything: teach, do his favorite excavations, have a family with children, and much more. A successful adventurer in the truest sense of the word.

—Naoya Gijo, when he stopped by the capital with his ??? store. This man has a biography and life principles that are cool enough for two mountains.

—Enbilulu, the owner of "Seven Knives" from Farris. I had the opportunity to interview him, but unfortunately, I never had the chance to publish it. But if you listen to his stories, there are endless adventures and dangers!

—Shiki, this is my friend from Asahina. A man who doesn't waste empty words and things. If he says something, it's the truth, and it cuts deeper than his weapon.

—And I haven't really met any losers:

—Let's say Ksion. He's a local traitor and gambler. He's a loser in every sense of the word. He invented all sorts of hyper-compensations and omnipotence for himself, and then he disappeared like a random secondary character from a book, who no one will remember after a day.

—The capital's librarian. The first one. Because I have a very strong feeling about books, and anyone who takes such a job without due respect for them is automatically the opposite of cool.

—A animal rights activist, whom we met here. I can understand the local residents, but why did she come here? It's just a wasted life because of crazy ideals instilled by a comfortable existence.

—Himal, this is a capital guard. We used to get along well, but after the last incident when he made me look crazy, I don't like him anymore. Let him sit in the office until he retires, filling out his documents, be-be-be.

—Well, and probably me. I just came home at the wrong time, and since then everything has gone wrong. And now I'm here, covered in zombie guts and wearing a "stupid" helmet, when I could have been inventing flying machines in the laboratory, or holding hands. Am I not a loser?

She arrives and finds there a mountain of weapons and armor, as well as something of that appearance in a single copy. 

 

Alright, one last question. What would you prefer - to become a Wizard in the ranks of the Harran Empire, or a subject of Felicia Lungworth? 

- There's no one else who could possibly own such luxurious whiskers, impeccable facial features, and a god-like physique. - Jingo confirmed that he was indeed Jingo.

- What's the case for? Not for glasses or a guitar?

- "All sorts of things," you mean. Jingo wouldn't waste his precious time on such nonsense.