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The issue isn't that both can do it, but that due to the slow data exchange, the visual representation for the second player displays incorrect information. So, when they think everything is okay and they've sent something, in reality, complete nonsense is happening. Therefore, the player who initiated the transfer of troops/artifacts should be the one performing all the actions.
We're talking about different things. I couldn't transfer the artifact because the Ctrl button is currently active during the transfer. And what you're talking about is how it works in War of the Throne (I've already forgotten which button you need to press to confirm the transfer), and that's why the initiator has full control there. It's not the same in SoD. And when players are linked, change whatever you want, just keep up with changing the direction of the transfer. Sometimes problems can occur if the host isn't connecting well with someone, but I haven't seen that happen in a long time.