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The rules state: If a stalemate situation occurs in battle, the attacking player must retreat. For example: the attacker has 100 dwarves left in the battle, and the defending hero has 1 fly. And the 100 dwarves cannot catch the fly. In this case, the attacker with 100 dwarves must retreat (or pay a bribe). If someone is wearing "War Shackles," you need to load the last save, repeat all the moves exactly as they were made before this battle, and disband the troops that were killed during this battle. Then, the player(s) wearing the shackles must remove them, the attacker must attack again, and then retreat/pay a bribe.
But in my situation, everyone is catching up to everyone else, but no one wants to attack first :D I think the rules should include my situation as an example of a stalemate because both I and my opponent searched the rules for this specific situation and couldn't find it...
If the attacker doesn't take the initiative, then, as I understand it from the rules, they need to do what Tvaryna wrote, i.e., remove the shackles and retreat.