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How can you even laugh about that?! Yesterday, I spent the whole night thanking Allah for making me a "hach."

You're lucky. They say that if there are 3-4 "hachs" in the barracks, they build the entire barracks. Why is that? It's an unknown phenomenon.
A friend of mine goes to boxing. He says that Russians are just losers, and they're really terrible, but "hachs" are doing well. It makes you think.
Maybe it's because they don't drink and act like jerks. In general, I agree with you, you're lucky.