Sacred Haven of Debauchery

Okay men, this is it.
I hope Europe will prosper properly, governed by the iron hand of a wise ruler. Someday in the distant future, when bloodthirsty, vile aliens cross our path, they will face a terrible fate at the hands of the Holy Jihad.
Rejoice, for Byzantium lasted the longest, but it too tasted our powerful, sweaty, sand-covered, circumcised, and bearded weapon – the truly faithful Muslim warrior.