Sacred Haven of Debauchery

My name is Lizarde, but my friends just call me "slipper." It's because my head looks a bit like a cookie since I was born. My IQ is one hundred and fifty (I took a test online). I would really like to meet other guys who are as tasty as I am. I'm interested in everything: stools, blue elves, and mustachioed dragons (I recently became obsessed with them). I'm very excited by blue-eyed crabs (a childhood trauma). What else can I say? I live under a skirt. I spend my days talking to a cactus. Sometimes this amuses me, and I crawl on the ceiling. I like to watch a bearded carpet being fried by a horror.