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Whether or not to offer autosaves is entirely up to the person offering them.
If they offer autosaves, consider yourself lucky.
If not, any complaining should be completely avoided. No complaints allowed. You lost, so you already lost! And an autosave is a second chance that your opponent has graciously decided to give you (or not).
That's all.
The problem is that, as a rule, people don't discuss autosaves in ICQ before the game. And when an opponent asks for an autosave, and I've already lost a lot but didn't ask for one, it's unclear what to do; it feels awkward to refuse. Therefore, I think there should be some generally accepted practice regarding this issue, even if it's just an informal one.