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Timy vs. Gur

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Dear Gur!
You say: "This is not a desire, it is a necessity." Perhaps you meant: The pursuit of excellence is your necessity.
That's right.
Then you say that you are not able to give up this necessity. Explain why.
I apologize, but this is confidential. I will explain approximately: succumbing to feelings can lead to irreparable mistakes. Sincerely, Timi.