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"Gentlemen guards, there must be some mistake here. Oh, you're probably new to the post. We were just passing through here ten times a day a week ago. Everyone here knows us! That bald gentleman over there tells excellent jokes about two sand dunes! And that one, who is impressively wide, was accidentally splashed with a bucket of water from the bathroom. How is it possible that you don't remember us? We even have a guest pass from the Great Tsar! What, has the pass expired? What a predicament. Excuse us, we are not locals. We humbly request that you remind His Unmatched Royal Majesty of our guest status."