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#2682
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Today, I was a sergeant in an empty military unit – the only person there. And then a new recruit arrived, reported to me clearly and concisely, and, considering it was the middle of the night, didn't even notice that there was no one else here but me. I then decided to play a joke on him and took him on a tour of the unit, showing him where everything was and telling him about it, addressing imaginary officers in my reports and chatting with the other personnel, who were supposedly behind closed doors, around corners, in rooms, or in corridors – in general, so as not to be seen by the private, who stood a little further away and obediently watched this scene. Sometimes, when I completely disappeared from his view – for example, when I went into a room – I would even answer for the other side in a supposed voice, so that it really seemed as if a dialogue had taken place. This continued for some time, until I gradually began to reduce the level of secrecy – for example, I openly showed him the empty guard post, shouted my words into the distance of the barracks, and with a laugh pretended that the soldier had messed up and was probably not standing at his post, but somewhere in the storage room, sleeping or on the toilet. Gradually, it all came to the point where I openly led the private to another place where there were supposed to be soldiers, and in reality, there was no one there. I introduced the new recruit to them as if nothing had happened, then jumped to the other side of the room, where these soldiers would have been standing, and answered in their voice, and so on, again and again. To my surprise, even at that moment, the private didn't even raise an eyebrow or show any sign that I was just being crazy, but with a serious face, he reported and nodded to his new comrades, whom I was staging at that moment. This story ended with me developing a deep respect for this new recruit and considering him a true soldier, strictly adhering to the letter of the regulations, and after thinking about it, I realized that he had also developed the same feelings for me for the same reason. The last thing I managed to think was that I would like to have more people like us in the armed forces; then, perhaps, order would finally prevail.
My sword, my trusted ally, unphased by my aspect.