Route

Hmm... Well... What can I say? Today, I once again realized that I am already dead. In the not-so-long years of my life, I have experienced a lot, been upset, been angry at fate, and given up. I had modest, yet unattainable dreams. Almost everything was predetermined by fate, and my desires never mattered to it. No matter what I did, I was destined to rot in a sick body and in a place that I despise. Today, I wanted to end it all not so much because of mental suffering, but because of physical pain. In the chaotic thoughts, one idea was indeed discernible: to stop suffering. Then, when I finally made it to morning, during the day, I suddenly realized that since I am already on the edge, I have nothing to lose by trying to move forward. And it doesn't even matter if my efforts will pay off or not. As long as my hands and feet are not bound, as long as my mind is thinking, no one will stop me from banging my head against this wall, trying to achieve what I want. I will simply imagine that I am already gone.