Posts from Sacred Haven of Debauchery Auto-translated

Okay. I will do that if I ever study another language again.

Added after 46 seconds
By the way, what's your name on my Skype? :D

photo sabotage, right?

Added 1 minute ago
I don't see you in my contacts. Maybe you're using a different account. Are you even in my contacts?

NightElvishWolf. I didn't delete you!
You need to change your account.

I guess I need it.

No, I don't need it.

Why bother learning words by rote? They instantly disappear from your memory if you don't connect them into sentences and use them in practice...

Typical girl problems.

Oh, did you know I'm a girl?

I know, I’ve always said that.

I get it, you don't like girls! But that's okay, I'm sure you and, for example, Nebkom will have a great time together.

As CHARACTERS? Not really. And what does Nebok have to do with it?

Well, if you combine a "HВшник" and a "педик," I immediately think of Nebok, haha. He made a lot of jokes about this topic.

you need to go to the chat. I forgot a long time ago that Nebo was joking about this.

No, that's not necessary.

I was just reminiscing while reading posts from two years ago =3

Added 35 seconds ago
Lyalya has a hole in her butt. It's terrible. She didn't have it when she was younger. But yesterday, Lyalya grew up and decided to wash her butt herself. And she discovered this terrible thing.
And immediately, a great sadness descended. Tears, worth a hundred carats, scorched the carpet, and on the tiles, they dried into salty roses.

In the past, when childhood wasn't so cruel, and pigeons grew to waist height, special people, from among the trained relatives, took care of the butt. They washed it cleanly, but silently. And yesterday, Lyalya checked it herself, and the world turned gray.

It used to be good, living with a cheerful, and most importantly, whole butt. Shape, color, aroma, sound – everything was perfect. Peaches considered this rear to be the best among them and tried to imitate it in everything. And suddenly, right in the center of the Danish kingdom, there's a hole, as unsettling as a whistle in the night. Suddenly, everything became uneasy, what if someone crawls into it? Or even worse, crawls out?

In novels about women with disheveled hair, they write like this: "Covered in tears, she rushed to her father." In literature, it's customary to run to one's father whenever one notices that one's husband has children from three secret affairs, or if a scoundrelly neighbor-planter bursts in at night, knocks her down, and, yes, makes a hole in her butt.
Of course, in novels, it's an exaggeration. Lyalya didn't run, covered in tears, but only up to her waist.

Now about Lyalya's father. He's a taciturn man with a romantic scar on his brain. Everyone knows about his selfless laziness and his wild imagination, exceeding the capabilities of God. For example, only he can photograph a person in such a way that it turns out to be a black square, a famous painting. And when he cooks pork with vegetables, he decides for himself whether to add beans or not. And then – to throw everything away with the pot, or to pick out the meat first. Because he has intuition and spiritual strength. It was he who taped the ball with tape, broke the chandelier with it, swept up the shards, and hid them in the sofa. Only such a father can help if the butt has sprung a leak.

Lyalya carefully poured water on her father up to his waist so that later she could write: "father and daughter, both in tears." And she demanded that he visually assess the damage, turning to the world with her front, and to her father with her back – look at what horror it is.
The fact that the hole is small, and even cute, did not become an argument. Peace and acceptance did not come.

But quite suddenly, on page 354, the father confesses that having a hole in the butt is a family trait. He, their mother Elena, and their shaggy sister Masha – they are all not hermetic. Moreover, farting is not an abstract voice from the sofa.

Despite all its incomprehensibility, the sudden sketch from the life of Lyalya's buttocks amused her. The cognitive dissonance ceased to be such a dissonance. Of course, it's a pity that we didn't turn out to be a family of princesses, but at least there's a topic for conversation with Svetka and Yulka, her friends.

On the other hand, I, for example, can no longer take pictures. Now, who knows what people will think when they look at my photos.

(c) Slava Se. "Secret. Even Top Secret."

Some have already completed this stage, while others are just beginning.