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And again about communism.
Added 30 minutes ago
Typical day of a typical house spirit.
October 12
Now I have a new notebook for my diary. I hid on the refrigerator to fill in my diary at three in the morning, and the hostess came to eat sausage at that time and naively thinks that no one sees her.
October 13
The cat is shedding. I sneeze. The mistress makes the sign of the cross.
October 15
We read Kama Sutra with the cat. Well, how did we read it? We laughed at the pictures. But then we thought a lot.
October 16
The cat pooped under the bed. I asked him – why? He says – it just happened somehow. He's worried. Asks me where he can hide for a couple of days.
October 17
The mistress’s boyfriend went to get slippers and got into… trouble. The cat sat on the shelf and pretended to be dusting.
The boyfriend reached for him, slipped and broke his arm. I fell from laughter along with the chandelier onto the mistress. According to the calendar – it’s an auspicious day.
October 19
The boyfriend isn’t coming yet. The mistress hit the cat with a slipper. Now he doesn’t talk to me. What do I have to do with it?
October 20
I gave the cat a note with a proposal for peace. He pretended for a long time that he knew how to read. In the end, he ate it and said he agreed. It seems I underestimated him. I hid the diary again.
October 22
We played rock-paper-scissors with the cat. It’s not interesting to play with him. Because besides paper, he cannot put anything else. Now he is lying on the bed and complaining about a headache.
October 23
The plumber came. Asked for a sixteen wrench. I handed it to him. What's with this habit of fainting?
October 25
Again, a priest, again incense. I asked him not to smoke too much. He said that since the money was paid, one must endure. Hinted at a kickback. He pretended not to hear me anymore.
October 26
I told the cat that there are many vitamins in geraniums. What will happen…
October 27
The mistress has been sleeping with the light on for two days. I periodically turn it off. It bothers her... Every time I fall asleep to prayer. I think Yesenin wrote better poems.
October 28
We celebrated the cat's birthday. We drank valerian, rode on the curtains, sang songs. In the evening we sat on the windowsill. The cat walked along the parapet and shouted that if he falls, nothing will happen because he has nine lives. That’s how stupid you get when drunk…
October 29
It sucks… I could use some milk…
October 30
We watched Animal Planet with the cat. He says that all lions are dumb bodybuilders because they sit on steroids. I think he is just jealous.
November 2
I told the cat that if you sit in a box, you can really lose weight. I walk around laughing…
November 3
Tomorrow, the hostess’s mother is coming to visit us. We’re waiting…
November 4
And here she is. The hostess’s mother arrived. I greeted her with bread and salt. That is, crumbs on the bed and salt in the tea. I don’t like guests. The cat told me that I am a sociopath. I do not argue.
November 5
The boyfriend in a cast came to meet his mother-in-law. Even the tolerant cat couldn't stand such rudeness. After all, he peed. In the boot. In the right one.
November 6
The cat got it from both the mistress and Zinaida Zakharovna – her mother. The boyfriend refrained. The cat endured everything heroically. Then he asked me - does he look like Joan of Arc? Where did he learn about her?
November 7
We played soccer with the cat using a champagne cork. Zinaida Zakharovna stepped on it and flew headfirst into the closet. Now we call her Zinedine Zidane. Behind her back, of course.
November 8
The mistress complained to Zidane about me. She replied that it was all nonsense and took away my bowl of milk. This is war. Carthage must be destroyed.
November 9
At an emergency meeting, the cat declared himself neutral. Traitor! Never mind, I’ll handle it myself.
November 10
I strangled grandma at night. Not even a whimper! Now she also snores like an old stallion!
November 11
Tonight at two in the morning, the hostess and grandmother bumped heads near the refrigerator. A meeting of gut-eaters on the Elbe, damn it!
November 12
I don't feel like fighting. All day I lay on the bed with grandma, watching season 27 of "What? Where? When?" on DVD. I laughed at her comments.
November 14
We discussed string theory with the cat. We agreed that it is much easier to play “Eighth Grader” on a six-string guitar.
November 15
The heating has been turned on. Finally! The cat thinks that the film "Batteries Ask for Fire" is about utility workers.
November 16
I told the cat that if he climbs onto the dining table, he will assert his leadership in the apartment. He hesitated for a long time, but climbed up. The mistress appeared as always unexpectedly. Flying past me, he managed to call me shit.
Twice.
November 17
At night, I whispered to grandma that it was time for her to go home. She got up and went to eat dumplings. Women… No logic…
November 18
The cat decided to stop eating Kitekat. He walks around angry and nervous. At night, five times he went out on the balcony, like to the toilet. It smells of Kitekat from him. He broke down, but continues to claim that he can quit at any moment. But he doesn't quit because it calms him down.
November 19
It seems that grandma is going home. Thank you, Perun!
November 20
We threw a farewell party for grandma. The cat peed (!) in her galoshes. Apparently, she annoyed him too. Grandma didn’t notice, so she left. I taught the cat to piss off crabs. A worthy deed. Goodbye, Zinedine! You will forever remain in our hearts! We will remember you this way – in galoshes full of crap…
November 22
I dropped an icon on the hostess. My bowl has been returned to its place. It seems we are starting to find common ground.
November 23
I told the cat that claws sharpen best on soft furniture. Now he sits in a locked closet and shouts obscene chastushki about House Spirits. By the way, some of them are quite good.
November 24
The boyfriend had his cast removed. He came today. Studying anatomy. They say that the clavicle breaks very easily. Let's focus on it.
November 25
The mistress wants to get a dog. The cat is scared in every sense of the word. Let's see who wins…(c)
Added 30 minutes ago
Typical day of a typical house spirit.
October 12
Now I have a new notebook for my diary. I hid on the refrigerator to fill in my diary at three in the morning, and the hostess came to eat sausage at that time and naively thinks that no one sees her.
October 13
The cat is shedding. I sneeze. The mistress makes the sign of the cross.
October 15
We read Kama Sutra with the cat. Well, how did we read it? We laughed at the pictures. But then we thought a lot.
October 16
The cat pooped under the bed. I asked him – why? He says – it just happened somehow. He's worried. Asks me where he can hide for a couple of days.
October 17
The mistress’s boyfriend went to get slippers and got into… trouble. The cat sat on the shelf and pretended to be dusting.
The boyfriend reached for him, slipped and broke his arm. I fell from laughter along with the chandelier onto the mistress. According to the calendar – it’s an auspicious day.
October 19
The boyfriend isn’t coming yet. The mistress hit the cat with a slipper. Now he doesn’t talk to me. What do I have to do with it?
October 20
I gave the cat a note with a proposal for peace. He pretended for a long time that he knew how to read. In the end, he ate it and said he agreed. It seems I underestimated him. I hid the diary again.
October 22
We played rock-paper-scissors with the cat. It’s not interesting to play with him. Because besides paper, he cannot put anything else. Now he is lying on the bed and complaining about a headache.
October 23
The plumber came. Asked for a sixteen wrench. I handed it to him. What's with this habit of fainting?
October 25
Again, a priest, again incense. I asked him not to smoke too much. He said that since the money was paid, one must endure. Hinted at a kickback. He pretended not to hear me anymore.
October 26
I told the cat that there are many vitamins in geraniums. What will happen…
October 27
The mistress has been sleeping with the light on for two days. I periodically turn it off. It bothers her... Every time I fall asleep to prayer. I think Yesenin wrote better poems.
October 28
We celebrated the cat's birthday. We drank valerian, rode on the curtains, sang songs. In the evening we sat on the windowsill. The cat walked along the parapet and shouted that if he falls, nothing will happen because he has nine lives. That’s how stupid you get when drunk…
October 29
It sucks… I could use some milk…
October 30
We watched Animal Planet with the cat. He says that all lions are dumb bodybuilders because they sit on steroids. I think he is just jealous.
November 2
I told the cat that if you sit in a box, you can really lose weight. I walk around laughing…
November 3
Tomorrow, the hostess’s mother is coming to visit us. We’re waiting…
November 4
And here she is. The hostess’s mother arrived. I greeted her with bread and salt. That is, crumbs on the bed and salt in the tea. I don’t like guests. The cat told me that I am a sociopath. I do not argue.
November 5
The boyfriend in a cast came to meet his mother-in-law. Even the tolerant cat couldn't stand such rudeness. After all, he peed. In the boot. In the right one.
November 6
The cat got it from both the mistress and Zinaida Zakharovna – her mother. The boyfriend refrained. The cat endured everything heroically. Then he asked me - does he look like Joan of Arc? Where did he learn about her?
November 7
We played soccer with the cat using a champagne cork. Zinaida Zakharovna stepped on it and flew headfirst into the closet. Now we call her Zinedine Zidane. Behind her back, of course.
November 8
The mistress complained to Zidane about me. She replied that it was all nonsense and took away my bowl of milk. This is war. Carthage must be destroyed.
November 9
At an emergency meeting, the cat declared himself neutral. Traitor! Never mind, I’ll handle it myself.
November 10
I strangled grandma at night. Not even a whimper! Now she also snores like an old stallion!
November 11
Tonight at two in the morning, the hostess and grandmother bumped heads near the refrigerator. A meeting of gut-eaters on the Elbe, damn it!
November 12
I don't feel like fighting. All day I lay on the bed with grandma, watching season 27 of "What? Where? When?" on DVD. I laughed at her comments.
November 14
We discussed string theory with the cat. We agreed that it is much easier to play “Eighth Grader” on a six-string guitar.
November 15
The heating has been turned on. Finally! The cat thinks that the film "Batteries Ask for Fire" is about utility workers.
November 16
I told the cat that if he climbs onto the dining table, he will assert his leadership in the apartment. He hesitated for a long time, but climbed up. The mistress appeared as always unexpectedly. Flying past me, he managed to call me shit.
Twice.
November 17
At night, I whispered to grandma that it was time for her to go home. She got up and went to eat dumplings. Women… No logic…
November 18
The cat decided to stop eating Kitekat. He walks around angry and nervous. At night, five times he went out on the balcony, like to the toilet. It smells of Kitekat from him. He broke down, but continues to claim that he can quit at any moment. But he doesn't quit because it calms him down.
November 19
It seems that grandma is going home. Thank you, Perun!
November 20
We threw a farewell party for grandma. The cat peed (!) in her galoshes. Apparently, she annoyed him too. Grandma didn’t notice, so she left. I taught the cat to piss off crabs. A worthy deed. Goodbye, Zinedine! You will forever remain in our hearts! We will remember you this way – in galoshes full of crap…
November 22
I dropped an icon on the hostess. My bowl has been returned to its place. It seems we are starting to find common ground.
November 23
I told the cat that claws sharpen best on soft furniture. Now he sits in a locked closet and shouts obscene chastushki about House Spirits. By the way, some of them are quite good.
November 24
The boyfriend had his cast removed. He came today. Studying anatomy. They say that the clavicle breaks very easily. Let's focus on it.
November 25
The mistress wants to get a dog. The cat is scared in every sense of the word. Let's see who wins…(c)
